


Love/Like

by NatannaMongeau



Category: Trash (youtube), Youtube RPF
Genre: F/F, First Kiss, I ship them but I don't want to make them uncomfortable, It's just fiction, YouTubers - Freeform, this isn't meant to be disrespectful to either of these people (or dan)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 17:10:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9081823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NatannaMongeau/pseuds/NatannaMongeau
Summary: “You said you ‘  like  ’ Dan… I thought you were   in love   with him?”





	

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so ready to write for these two, I ship them so hard... Just everything about it is goals.  
> (Plus I have a huge crush on Anna and her accent so like OMFGGG)
> 
> But anyway, this is a fic. I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable with this. Not Anna. Not Natalia. Not Dan. Okay? They ask me to take this down I will.

It’s absolutely ridiculous -- just how easy it is for Natalia to get her to open up.

Anna isn’t a secretive person in the slightest, she’s shared her life with the internet for nearly a decade, told all of her worst stories, everything from getting blackout drunk to how she’d gotten her first kiss at eleven, but _somehow_ , Natalia still finds a way to dig deeper. She brings out she shit she would never even think to tell the internet… But when it’s just the two of them alone, somehow Anna can’t stop herself from sharing everything with Nat.

It’s almost like she wants Natalia to know _all_ of her, good from bad and to have her still remain by her side, despite the things that Anna tries to forget, the things she regrets most. Or maybe she’s just trying to find a story scary enough to push the dark haired girl away because as much as Anna hates to admit it, sheś a little scared of the dark haired girl, or at least what does to her.

Sometimes, Anna is revealing things about herself before she even gives her mouth the permission to move. Which, is how she lets slip the thing she’s been suppressing since she was fourteen and realized she thought the soft, beauty of girls was just as attractive as the handsome solidness of a boy.

They’re laughing and unpacking some stuff in their third or fourth hotel, their lone laughter filling the space as they joke about how many times they’ve gotten kicked out of where they’re staying when suddenly, Natalia mentions something about one of the girls being gorgeous when suddenly Anna blurts: “I like _girls_.”

The redhead freezes up, staring down at her hands balled up in an oversized shirt belonging to her _boyfriend_. The silence that follows the sentence is deafening to her ears.

“ _So?_ ” Is finally Nat’s response, she’s laughing a little.

It doesn’t help the anxiety spiking up through her. The way it squeezes around her lungs and makes her feel like tears are going to come spilling from her eyes like a dam breaking.

“No… Nat… Not in like…  A friend way.” She just wants herself to _stop talking_ , but it’s _Nati_ and she _can’t_.

“Okay,” Natalia breathes.

It feels so much bigger than that, but then again maybe she’s making it a bigger deal than it should be. “I’ve never…” She chokes up a little, terror constricting her throat, the idea that this could spread fast in the group and eventually to the internet knocking around loudly in the forefront of her brain. “I’ve never said it out loud before.”

“Anna. Look at me,” Nat pleads, sounding serious and concerned like she knows it’s important.

She shakes her head, willing her tears to stop and her breath to even out, but they don't and she’s forced to look up, emotions on full display.  

Natalia is a whole nother story. Her eyes are bright and full of overwhelming emotion. “Anna, It’s okay.”

It doesn’t feel okay. It feels the opposite. It feels like her whole world is crashing down around her. She can barely stop herself from revealing what’s brought these repressed feelings up to the surface so suddenly.

“What about Dan?” Natalia questions after Anna doesn’t respond.

The question doesn’t make Anna any less stressed. “I still like Dan… I’m not… I’m not a _lesbian_ ,” she attempts to explain for the first time. She isn't totally sure what to say, she’s never tried to define herself before, she’ only ever pushed the thoughts away. “I guess I’m bi?”

“Like?”

“Huh?”

“You said you ‘ _like_ ’ Dan… I thought you were _in love_ with him?”

It’s true, she did, she even would probably say that she _does_ , just not in the same way as before. A lot had changed in just a few days. Maybe the emotions had been changing for a while. She and Dan had been arguing a lot, he had been getting so, so _tired_ of the fans and the pressure that put upon them even going outside together. Maybe meeting Natalia in person just speed up what was already in motion. Before this trip, just texting Nati had Anna’s heart thundering, in a way Dan hadn’t in a long time, but he was still her _best friend_.

"Well... Things change. I do love him... Just not like before."

"It just... When I first met you it always seemed like you wanted to spend your life with him."

"I did... Other things came up, though."

"Like what?"

" _You._ " Anna doesn't mean to say it aloud, but then it goes silent and she realizes she had. "Oh my god... Natalia-" She started to step towards the now stunned girl, who seemed to be sitting in disbelief, then thought better of it. She didn't want to alarm her friend more than she already had. "Fuck. Nati... I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me. You're just... So beautiful and you make me laugh and there's something about you that makes my stomach flip like I'm on a rollercoaster but it's good and it's scary but also I don't ever want to stop feeling it and-" In midst of her anxiety induced rambling, Natalia had stepped forward and was now standing mere inches from her. "Is there any way I can make this up to you? I just don't want you to hate me-"

Then soft, moist lips are pressing against hers and god, it feels like her first breath of fresh air in weeks. Standing there, they both slowly test the waters, both slowly easing themselves into the easiness of the kiss. It's tender and Anna feels like she has sparks flying all over her body because it's just so nice. Calming. 

"I could never hate you, Anna," the taller girl breathes, looking equally as emotional. Anna has her mouth back on hers before there is any chance for her to continue because right now, the last thing she want to do is talk. She just wants to get as much of Natalia as she can before they're separated. 


End file.
